A Good & A Bad Kind of Day

Today is what I would call a “good day” and a “bad day”.  The good news is that I received news that my lymph nodes did not show evidence of cancer.  My surgical wounds are healing well, and the pain is down considerably.  The bad news is, I stayed awake in a state of worry for nothing last night and my tumor was bigger than expected.  At 1.8 cm, and the nature of my pathology, I must now receive not 2, but 3 chemotherapy agents every three weeks for a year.  I should lose my hair after the first round of chemo.  Not that I’m worried about that, because summer is coming and I found some cute and stylish head scarves to wear. 

I must confess, it has been hard to play the role of an invalid, relying on others to help me do the simplest of tasks.  Unable to drive anywhere or getting into my gardens, I feel at times like a prisoner in my own home.  As I was reading Philemon this week, I was reminded of the Apostle Paul who wrote many of his epistles while locked up in a cramped prison cell where he was chained, physically abused and often cut off from friends.  Paul’s conditions were no picnic and he never spoke of being a prisoner of his circumstances; instead, he called himself “a prisoner of Christ” (see Philemon 1:1; Ephesians 3:1). The Apostle Paul understood God’s sovereign will and embraced these circumstances for his life at that moment. 

I am certainly not suffering like Paul and I by no means am I isolated from my family, ministry or the church.  I have met wonderful women who have taken time to bring my family a meal.  I have received countless cards and words of encouragement.  I have received lovely flowers and gifts to brighten my day.  I may be limited physically at the present, but if I consider my healing a time to be a Prisoner of Christ, what a privilege that is.  As a matter of fact, if you love God and have chosen to serve Him, you too are a prisoner of the Lord.  So, no matter what your fight or circumstance, if you are a prisoner of the Lord, you have the choice to persevere and give Him all the glory!